Saturday 17 March 2018

#475 Searching high and low

Tonight's search for a soulful blog had me checking out some entries by prostitutes, drug users and alcoholics. That's what it had come to. I was searching on the wrong side of the tracks.

I'd hoped their blogs were crammed with deeply personal experiences, emotions and unique stories but most of the links hadn't been updated in years or were singular pieces rather than ongoing blogs.

Despite the odd addict or sex worker having achieved a flicker of fame through their literary efforts, most didn't blog. If they did, it was usually about other things. A couple of their articles were interesting enough but I wanted someone to follow. A character through whose eyes I could see a different world.

I'd asked the good folks of Quora if they knew such a blog. The responses were unsatisfying, even moreso than the Facebook group I'd asked previously. The links they provided were by a man who wrote about being an electrician (yawn) and a woman whose descriptive style would be at home on an episode of The Royle Family.

Despite not finding the blogs I wanted, I was now following twenty. Out of the shadier efforts I'd perused this evening, there was one I might have taken a second look at. It was way different from the other blogs I followed. Completely insane levels of exuberance and unquestionable authenticity. She wasn't a terrible writer either, I mean the structure was there.

The tone was sickly-impactful; reading it felt like drinking Sunny D, which I'd only ever done once twenty years ago but could still remember the taste. The blog hadn't been updated in four months but was still available to read. It's name? The Horribly Happy Hooker. It had strong adult themes but then so did reality. And reality, was what I was searching for.


Fizzfan said...

Well it was definitely more impactful and interesting than most blogs! Pretty funny in places too and the whole Irish thing quite revealing, and of course I’m more than happy to blame Catholicism:)
Her one post about Scandinavia also happy to agree with (based on no actual experience) because they just seem to have better everythings.
I’m slightly fascinated by their culture and although in no part related to her approval rating, if I could have chosen a place to have been brought up, it would definitely be one of their countries.
It was good to hear she’s a winner in an industry that has many more losers, but it was so unapologetically upbeat and combative it became a bit soulless.
Maybe doing something thought of as being so servile, while actually being such an alpha in control person, would make you a bit defensive. I guess societies general view of her career must seem like a dungeon of heaving hypocrisy for her to rail against though.
I could happily agree with a lot of what she wrote, so I’m quite glad my general views have been formed from a gentler lifestyle and my realities have kept her kind very much at a distance.
I suppose I’m being one of those people she detests in making any kind of judgement call. However, it’s not because I have any problem with what she does, it’s just because I wonder about the toxic effect it has on a less robust psyche, when you’re just being bought and reduced to the sum of your anatomy just to satisfy other people’s carnal desires and you have no emotional connection to them or indeed even fancy them.
I can only assume the revulsion is something you must become sort of immune to.
Her main focus of victory against the odds seems to be her bulging bank balances and being a rule breaker, and it was good to hear a voice that gave a different perspective on this lifestyle choice, but I’m still left feeling a bit hollow. It was just too full of dynamic cynical positivity.
She’s clearly a force to be reckoned with and winning at what she wants though, so good for her.

Like your new pic!

Profound Familiarity said...

It was combative wasn't it? Do you think the tone suggests elements of denial? Actually maybe that's not it - maybe it's just overly defensive because she feels threatened by society's opinions and isn't particularly self aware vis-a-vis how apparent the defensiveness is and how people perceive it.

The defensiveness makes you wonder how robust the psyche really is.

Also you've gotta hope she gets some other skills under her belt for the future. I can't imagine her keeping it up all the way until retirement age.

Fizzfan said...

Yeah, I think it was the complete lack of any negatives about the effect her lifestyle had on her mindset that made me feel she was either a bit of a sociopath or in denial.
I got the impression she’s leading some kind of double life and mixes in country club circles of excess and luxury.
It would be easy to imagine that carrying off that kind of double life might be quite satisfying to her. Maybe it even helps to crystallise some weird sense of superiority.
If I’m honest I’ve always been unable to understand any concept of enjoying selling your body let alone justifying it into being proud of it, but that doesn’t mean anything other than I can’t understand it.
If she’s to be believed, she’s rockin n rolling n rich and has a better incite into human nature than most other people. Trouble is, that kind of understanding must surely come at a cost that any amount of money really can’t make good.
Once you’re that far off the beaten track, maybe you just have to keep battling through the undergrowth shouting loudly to scare off the demons.
She comes across loud n proud because she’s successful, but long and short of it is, it’s still really a dirty secret and there’s no genuine pride in that.
Wealthy survivor. I’ll give her that and yes, you’d hope she’s got a future plan unless of course there’s a market for Granny groping?Ewwww:(

Profound Familiarity said...

She might be semi-retired now. Her blog was in its prime back in 2012/2013. The entries decline in 2014 and she's only written three since.

Twitter's the same. The account looks like it was set up just to echo the blog but she only has ten followers.

I'd tell her to keep up the writing but blog comments are disabled.