Monday 30 May 2016

#153 Something More Tubular

Bakerloo I like you lots
Your old sofas hug our botts
Circle you are far too slow
You're not even round, you know
Jubilee where is your soul?
You're too tidy for a hole
Northern you're our trusted friend
That's unless it's a weekend
Vicky you might be quite nice
If you weren't so full of mice
District you are long aren't you?
That's what she said and it's true
Piccadilly, watch me go
From Cockfosters to Heathrow
Metropolitan you're mauve
Just for that, you're worth a rove
Hammersmith and city don't
think I'll ride you, cause I won't
Central Central I just wish
that we didn't have to squish
DLR you're such a geek
Plus you always howl and creak
Waterloo and city's last
you are small but you are fast.

Sunday 22 May 2016

#152 Fireflies

Friday 17 May. 9am. I was on my way to work. "Maybe if I watch one episode of House of Cards first thing, as soon as I get in and then turn the laptop off, I won't carry on binge-watching it later when I should be going to sleep" I thought. 

The idea didn't seem very exciting. Last night I'd tried watching it at my desk instead of on the sofa, to see if, once I got tired, I'd more naturally become less comfortable, close the lid and go to bed. It hadn't worked.

One of the partners at work had recently told us that his favourite book was The Art of War, the ancient Chinese military guide, which had been translated and picked up by leaders the world over. I wanted to get my hands on it. I felt that if I made Netflix seasons my enemy and planned the tactics carefully enough, I just might win the battle and be able to watch them in moderation. 

I looked up the Wikipedia entry for the book and read its description. "The text stresses that war is a very grave matter for the state and must not be commenced without due consideration." That didn't sound too appealing. I wonder what the most famous book on diplomacy is.

Luisa suggested that I was making myself tired on purpose. I told her that I thought it seemed unlikely, adding that at least I wasn't consciously aware that it was likely. I've been caveating levels of consciousness a lot lately.

Sunday 15 May 2016

#151 All change

"You just keep getting more and more irresistable" I thought to myself as I walked past the dining room mirror. It was a usual Saturday morning and my housemate Marc, who had become, for some reason, my only housemate, was out at a parkrun. I've never met a park and I don't know how he makes them run. He must be very scary. Most of the time, I'm just pretending to listen so that he'll give me food.

At some point later in the morning, once Marc was back, there came a knock at the door. You'll never guess who had the cheek to show up. It was RICH! I couldn't believe it. Rich. He obviously missed me a lot and had come to say hello but I wondered why. He doesn't often visit me.

I'd known for a while that some kind of change was coming. There'd been a lot of movements and rearrangements in the house. Dan had got me some treats, before he mysteriously left. Marc had been spending more time in the lounge. The girls had also vanished and taken all of their furniture. I hoped Marc wouldn't leave too.

Rich picked up the cat carrier and brought it into the kitchen. I darted. I hate that thing. It used to be quite fun to climb into but the last time I was in there, they took me to some dude in a white coat. It was all very embarrassing. I didn't want to go in the carrier but Rich picked me up and put me in it. He waved goodbye and then Marc put me into his car.

I've been in moving vehicles before and it's not the scariest thing in the world but it is pretty much almost the scariest. You have no idea where you're going or how long the journey will take. Imagine how that must feel.

Marc and Dan were chatting fairly casually. I meowed a lot to tell them I was apprehensive. Dan poked his fingers through the cage sometimes and talked at me. It didn't seem like the world was coming to end but I was still very nervous. I threw up in the cat carrier and had to sit beside it.

After a short while, we arrived somewhere new. They brought me inside and let me out. Two older people and a girl. It smelled like they had another animal. I walked out of the cage and said a brief hello to the people. Why was I here? I walked around, smelling things. I like having an explore. It was all very new and strange.

Dan stuck around for a while and the older people fed him. Dan usually feeds himself, or gets a man to bring him food to the house. They fed the girl and me too. They must have a lot of food.

I went to the window and saw there was a dog outside. I stared hard and gave a sharp hiss. The older woman heard it but didn't sound too concerned. When Dan had finished eating, the girl ushered him into her car. She started the engine and I heard the sound of the car driving away. I went back to my exploring.