In recent years, both my parents have asked me to make websites. Not for them, for their friends. I think that's the way it goes with baby boomers. After you hit twenty five, they stop doing things for you and require help with anything vaguely techy. Mine still drive me places but hey, car-sharing is good for the environment.
I mean less bad for the environment.
The best thing for the environment would be for everyone to kill themselves.
That's why it's best to keep an eye on what Greenpeace are saying but keep the other eye peeled in case they ever become too powerful...
I made a website for an electrician, which never got used. Now I'm tasked with making one for a landlord. The guy can run a small business arranging the building, maintenance and letting of luxury continental villas, yet he can't Google "How to create a website".
Fine. It might be good for me to engage with "the family".
I've been told I'll get a free lunch or something.
Good.
That should almost cover a quarter of the train fare.
Zucks eat your fucking heart out.
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Hmm. Everyone killing themselves at once might contaminate the environment? Predators might die of heart attacks from too much food and upset the biodiversity, and the next tier animals will grow too numerous for their food sources.
Sounds like the family want an excuse to see you. What meal are you hoping to get, your favourite? My Mums gone now , but her roast lamb, and vegetarian lasagne were highlights. Do you eat steak?
I was going to say that nothing eats us but mosquitos do, so there would be a disturbance in the food chain. On the other hand, think of all the species that will probably go extinct over the next hundred years, whereas the extinction of homo sapiens would only be the loss of one species.
I find the thought of having and being made a favourite meal quite sad. I don't know what we'll eat. Sandwiches probably, it's only Friday lunchtime.
I do indeed eat steak. Sometimes. I went through a phase of microwaving it, which got some great reactions. I usually fry or bake it now though.
You?
You don't have a favourite meal?
I do know the favourite meal of your country is curry.
I need to eat red meat every two days b cause of iron deficiency.
Are there supplements for that sort of thing?
All my favourite foods are unhealthy and I eat plenty of that kind of stuff already.
Yes, but meat works better for me. If I'm dizzy or seeing spots I can just have some roast deli meat sitting on a park bench, like other people would eat an I ecream or something, and I'm soon feeling better, often.
What things?
Festering in every town, beneath a glowing neon crown, I sizzle, spit and fry my skin, as greasy as a car engine, then slither down into your throat, my sticky residue will coat the very channels of your heart while gas eruptions fast depart. They wash me down with lager till I splurge and gurgle into swill and still the customers return, desperate not to ever learn to eat the things they know they should. Because I taste so very good.
Neon crown, no I don't recognise that one . Sounds like chicken?
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