Friday 29 December 2017

#357 Mark and Lisa's wedding

Mark and Lisa entertained me. I found them amusing. Friendly. Easy to get along with. That was why I was going to their wedding. To honour who they were as people. From my perspective, anyway. Also because I'd know a fair few people there.

In recent years, I'd declined more wedding invites than I'd accepted. They often came from people I hadn't seen - and probably wouldn't see again - for a very long time. Spending an entire day to sit at the back of some hall, with people I didn't know, waiting eight hours to eat some poxy slice of cake seemed ludicrous. Today was different. Naino would be there, along with several other ex-Dulwich housemates and their friends. It was also an easy venue to get to.

It would still be a long day though. Accordingly, I'd been racking my brain, trying to come up with some ways in which I could make the experience more useful. Asking people about their jobs, avoiding talking about my career change, paying attention to what I liked and didn't like.  Thinking of people as characters rather than people. I even Googled "How can introverts stay energised while socialising?" Apparently eating and drinking was recommended. As if I'd forget.

None of the thoughts or tips from the Google search felt like things that I particularly wanted to focus on at the wedding. I didn't want to turn up with an agenda. At least, I hadn't found one that I'd like to go with. So I'd be going in unarmed. Unprepared for the day ahead. At the mercy of what the other guests wanted to talk about. Fortunately, I was a good listener.


Fizzfan said...

I’ve never liked weddings and am always pleased when I can swerve them, especially if the church bit is included as it makes the day so bloody long.

I have been to a couple that were fun, most notably when the reception was in a barn and they had an Irish jig band with clog dancers and a burger van you had to line up and get your food from. Very unpretentious and it seemed to infect everyone with a feeling of friendliness and there was lots of dancing and smiling faces.

I’m quite bad with posh protocols and pomp. I feel like a six year itching with boredom and sometimes start compulsively yawning.
Yes introverts don’t like large gatherings. They are so stuffed with small talk and superficial nonsense.

I was better at socialising when I was younger I think, possibly because it was all newer to me. It definitely gets to a stage when it’s all, been there, done that and worn the t-shirt. Yawn.

Not sure you can plan a social success. Everything is so dependent on so many other things.

Hope it went well anyway:)

Profound Familiarity said...

I guess you get some of your social needs met by your family.

I think if a person likes a drink, they might remain more sociable into adulthood. I can have one or two, then I get tired and fed up. In this way, my appetite for staying out is capped by my limited appetite for alcohol.