Thursday 14 December 2017

#342 Thinking about maybe doing something

I'd been thinking of attending a writing group for a while. Mainly to meet people. The thought of having to sit for a fixed length of time and buy coffee while writing sounded hellish though. Maybe I could skip it and just go for drinks afterwards. No, that would be cheating.

I could turn up and write until I got bored, then pretend to write but play games or watch Netflix instead. My laptop was really old, a bit on the large side and needed cleaning. Ok so I'd clean my laptop. With a toothbrush. And a really, really small amount of water.

I'd need a new laptop battery. What laptop did I even have? I flipped it upside-down and held it for a while, peering at the half-worn out label. I wrote down the model number and Googled it. I could get a battery that would arrive in one to two business days. Cool.

What did writers wear? Nothing too smart. In fact, the more bedraggled I looked, the better. Ok, so I wouldn't shave. What would I say to the people there? Um... hello... how're you? As if I'd care in the slightest how someone I'd never met before was. Unless they'd just lost a limb or something. In which case it would be quite obvious how they were.

"Do you come here often?" Too flirty. "So you like writing, huh?" Too obvious. "I'm actually an undercover FBI agent." Too untrue. And American. Wow, this whole business of meeting people was proving very hard. And I hadn't even done it yet.

I wished I still had that pair of shoes that were really cool. Those ones with the stripey bits. I loved those shoes. I could turn up anywhere in them and people would know I was cool without me having to open my mouth. Now the only shoes I had were regular boring shoes. How was I supposed to meet people in boring shoes? I'd have to have a think about it and try and come up with an answer. In the next one to two business days.

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