Friday 27 October 2017

#294 How to make de-alcoholised wine taste better

Sat here looking at this title.

Y'know, I said probably about ten blog posts ago I wouldn't make any SEO kind of changes around here. Then went and changed about fifty post titles so they read like the kind of shit that SEO breeds.

Don't follow me down this road. It's not worth it. The world will never be the same. Write what you want to write, not what you think some poor fucker might search for. I have no problem with hypocrisy. Besides which, nobody is ever going to search for this. That's what you call hedging your statements.

How did we get here?

The reason that I was stupid enough earlier today to buy a bottle of balsamic vinegar to pour into the de-alcoholised wine is no more complicated than my dislike of wine in general. I never drank it because I liked it. Only occasionally because it was sharp. You know you're drinking something when you drink wine. Hold your nose, it kind of works.

The beauty of this little experiment was that I knew noone else would be able to comment on it. It wasn't even my idea. The de-alcoholised bottle was. For what purpose? To see what it tasted like. I never drank it to get drunk. If it tasted like wine, that was ok by me. It didn't, it tasted awful. Like spoiled Ribena. It was on a par with non-alcoholic beer. I'll cover that subject when I get really low on ideas.

This isn't about de-alcoholised wine though, this is about how to improve it. Add some vinegar. It's not the alcohol it's missing. It's the acidity. Hehehe. The reader's thinking please! Why would you take away my alcohol? Why? The smell is the worst part. I hate drinking wine that smells of vinegar. I wonder if there's a way to mask that.

It improves the taste. That's what I think. Otherwise there's no kick. The vinegar adds the kick. Then you're drinking something. Something that would probably be described as awful, awful, awful wine. The worst you've ever had but at least it tastes like wine. Not spoiled Ribena.

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