Saturday 8 July 2017

#201 Remembering how to dream

Back in 2014, I was friends with a Baltic girl. At her request, she remained nameless as far as my writing was concerned, an admirable salute to basic privacy. Now and then I happen to walk by an area of the city that neighbours hers and am able to peer over in that general direction. Doing so tempts me to beckon her to the nearest rooftop for the pleasure of exchanging a wave but we lost touch some time ago. I fear I may have antagonised her to boot.

An occasional topic of our conversations was the idea that she would one day own a small bakery. I've added the word small to make it sound cute although this particular girl had not once in her life thought small about anything. Chances are, she'll end up taking on Greggs.

It was her idea but I think I raised it more often than she did. She would design and bake the pastries and I would handle the bookkeeping, a task I fancied I could perform well enough with some basic training.

As adults we sometimes lose our ability to dream. Reality erodes it and places a higher price on fantasies than the child who thought of them would have appreciated. I don't remember having many ambitions in my youth. I did for a while wish to own a small shed that I could hide in. When I grew up, I wanted to become the man who clambered up the ladders in the Ikea warehouse to fetch items for customers. Perhaps there's still time.

I sometimes think about what I'd sell in a bakery, if I ran one. It disturbs me to visit one that doesn't stock this cake or that, or fails to make an item a certain way. I'd have muffins, cookies and doughnuts. Shortbread, flapjacks and gingerbread men. Then possibly eclairs and viennese fingers. Definitely brownies. I'd like to make an original bakewell tart, with a generous layer of jam and buttercream icing.

The bakery in my town when I was young always had bacon and cheese turnovers. They left the rind on the bacon, nestled it in tangy cheddar, threw in a well-cooked slice of tomato and housed it in fresh, flaky pastry. You could buy a side of roast potatoes to accompany it. Every dream has roots in a past experience.

"He who controls the past commands the future, He who commands the future, conquers the past."
- Kane



21 comments

Running on empty said...

Oh, now you've gone and made me hungry.

I wanted to learn to play the harp and have a career as a radio announcer. My parents had other ideas.

Fizzfan said...

I wanted to be a ballet dancer or a vet. Pretty sure I'd have been rubbish at both though due to my propensity to blub if I ever see animals in distress, and the fact that my foot arches fell when I was 11 due to Mum bending to my insistence of wearing fashionable high wedge shoes.
It must be a complete blessing to have a job that you love but good old reality clearly puts paid to that for the vast majority of people.
Nice to have a little dabble with writing on blogs though. It's been a sort of dreamlike notion for years to write a book but again, reality demands my time is spent 'working' at my job, not my dreams.

Running on empty said...

Lol, I noticed "working" , ?

Unknown said...

My dream is to have a pastry shop, William Curley style but more affordable. I'm hoping to make it come true in few years...

Fizzfan said...

Dan, what's your dream now? Is it still food based?
If your descriptions are anything to go by, you'd make a great food writer or restaurant critic.

Running on empty said...

Zaneta, I hope that comes true for you.

Dan, Fizz makes a good point, you could do reviewing on the side.

Profound Familiarity said...

Them harps aint cheap

Profound Familiarity said...

You're in insurance, right Fizz? Married? Kids?

Profound Familiarity said...

Hey Zaneta, that sounds cool. Please send us the address once you're up and running so we can come buy cakes from you.

Profound Familiarity said...

I started a new job last week organising training but I'm really struggling. I might quit and try to get a writing job.

Running on empty said...

Yes, pity I'm not going to Heaven.

Running on empty said...

Too soon to quit, give it a chance first.

Profound Familiarity said...

You're probably right Cath although there does come a point where to keep pushing and pushing at something isn't healthy.

Profound Familiarity said...

and it should be me who decides when that point comes.

Profound Familiarity said...

On the side of what? :) :)

Fizzfan said...

Yes I have the title of 'Trading Underwriter'. I have zero interest in insurance but do like chatting with brokers on the phone, so it's tolerable. Know some lovely colleagues though, some of whom have become friends, so all in all, things could definitely be worse.
Married yes, and one Son, who's still finding his feet at 21. He's going back to college in Sept. Second time round. He still has no idea what he wants to do but at least he's trying to focus on his main skill which is writing.
I'd like it very much if he found a sense of satisfaction in his work life.
What kind of job do you have, or are looking to do?

Fizzfan said...

Oops, just read your other post further down the page. Will reply to that.

Fizzfan said...

Is it the work itself, or are you not getting enough support? Or both?

Profound Familiarity said...

They're two sides of the same coin

Profound Familiarity said...

Only God knows who's going to Heaven. Isn't that right?

Jonathan Bandit Copping said...

Ah memories of Plaxtol Bakery. We liked the iced ring donuts with speckles,