Monday, 15 April 2013


#13 The status quo

Fair weather runners, don't be too proud of this technological arsenal you've constructed. The abilitiy to monitor your distance, calories and heart rate is insignificant next to the power of the Force.

Flora margarine has worked so hard on its recipe and brand in recent years that I was actually surprised to see that it had any saturated fat in it at all.

One of my house mates has found a way to make fifteen bucks and thirty one cents an hour gluing assorted stickers on to paper in the shape of dinosaurs. I calculated the US. dollar equivalent because I wanted to write the word bucks.

Did you know that before they turned thirty, JK Rowling, Harrison Ford, Operah Winfrey and Jane Austen were all nobodies like the rest of us. I told Keira the house cat that at least she didn't have to worry about turning thirty. Then I thought about this and checked how old she was in cat years. Turns out she's thirty six. Then I called her a milf. She ran into the laundry room and hasn't spoken to me since.

Does anyone know if Beyonce has any latin heritage? It's not the sort of thing I'd know. There's a Spanish version of her duet with Shakira, Beautiful Liar and I just assumed that she must be like half Spanish or something but it turns out she's a Texan. I wanted to find out if she went to the effort of learning Spanish or if she just knew it from when she was a kid or something.

Night night.




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